And so, I am done.
I find that completing my comprehensive exams gives me an odd feeling. I felt ecstatic, if more than a little surreal, upon finally completing my MA. But now that my MLS is essentially within reach--just getting those exams passed and finishing two more months of school--I don't have quite the same feeling.
I feel emptied--I don't mean that in a negative sense. I feel that all my life, all twenty-seven years, have been preparing. Preparing for college, preparing for grad school, preparing for marriage, preparing for that elusive First Real Job. I feel, now, like all that preparation is over. It's been a lifestyle of "someday when..." and now Someday is here.
It's exciting, but not in a high-energy sense. I feel as though I'm standing on the edge of a very tall cliff spreading my arms and looking down, but instead of my usual goals (graduating, getting a job), I see this expanse of bright white space. It's tranquil and freeing and oddly scary all at the same time.
And now: my Real Life begins.
I wonder what it'll be like?